As human beings and seekers of love and compassion, we are all enamoured by the concept of ‘forever’. Love you forever, best friends forever, friendship forever, partners forever. As the chasers of joy, comfort and well-being, it is our deepest desire to have that chunk of happily ever after, the future which even though uncertain looks flawless and almost perfect – despite knowing the fact that we live in an ever-changing world where change is the only constant.
Now, honestly speaking, there is nothing erroneous in chasing forever or going after forever because if something is very dear to you, it is but obvious, you want to hold it tight – so that it remains with you always. However, if you quickly rewind your own journey from an infant to a grown-up, you’ll realize that evolution, growth and development is what makes you what you are and where you are today.
Forever Is a Myth – Understanding the Concept of FOREVER and Happily Ever After
The future is uncertain, everything is changing in a nanosecond – times change, people evolve, society progresses, technology upgrades because just like the second’s hand on the clock everything is on the move. So, if we aspire to hold onto things despite being aware of the fact that everything surrounding us is temporary, we are only fooling ourselves. We need to ride along and flow with time instead of being attached – whether it is our attachment towards people, the good times and/or the comfort zone that we are in.
When everything is goody two shoes, we want time to stop, things to remain as they are and, in the process, we even obsess the very thing to remain forever; forgetting that forever is an abstract concept. We then, like fools, start doing everything in our control and power to keep things the same way. We compromise, we make adjustments and even end up planning and preparing dedicatedly for an illusional forever future both in our personal and professional life – forgetting that no matter how good or bad, happy or sad things are, they are going to change or take another form just like energy and waves.
This is the reason when things do change and life takes us on a bumpy ride, we are not ready to accept the change, especially if it isn’t what we really desired or aimed for. We are not ready to accept the breakup, the end of an association, the dissolution of our start-up, our best friend moving on with their individual life, the sudden separation from our loved ones and even our economic failure. We are then in a state of shock, mental agony and enormous pain – totally ignoring the very fact that the future is unpredictable. And as much as there is this probability of happiness and joy, there is also a possibility that all your planning can go down the drain in a single moment. One major twist and it can create havoc both in your personal as well as professional life. But then, forever is a myth and even the saddest life-changing event won’t stay forever.
Even I believed that my best friend from my school days would be my friend forever and we will eventually grow old together. A good 14 years and the friendship died its own death post her marriage. We are not even on talking terms but we are happy individually in our own lives and wish only good things for each other. Well, yet again, forever is a myth and so is the happily ever after. However, as life goes on, I have made some amazing friends as well as associates that I cherish and I’m sure she too might have. This is not just our story it is everybody’s reality.
Every person on this planet goes through a major change, transformation and sometimes an incident can change them 360 degrees; and this is precisely when they evolve towards their own journey called life in which they may tend to outgrow few older ones. However, outgrowing is not always about losing, it also means attracting and meeting new ones based on our present reality and mindset. No wonder, at each stage of our life we meet amazing new people and sometimes even the incredible ones who not only touch our souls, but even change us and our life for the better – they may be in the form of a lover, friend, or perhaps even a business partner. But again, these are soulmates who meet you right when you and they are in the same space. Once, you or they outgrow this space, the distance will be obvious because the people you meet are fellow travellers not necessarily heading towards the destination you aim to reach. Again, moving on is painful but this is a cycle and the wheels of the cycle tend to repeat.
So, seize the present moment – Be yourself, love unconditionally, laugh happily and live life unapologetically. Cherish the present, be thankful about it, and live it to the fullest but never hold on to it and be obsessed about it – whether it is the people to who you are attached or situations that is favourable to you. Prepare and plan all you want, but do not, I repeat, do not let all this planning and scheduling for the unpredictable future, ever stop you from being happy today. Nothing is forever, neither the pressure at which the blood flows in your body nor the rate at which you breathe oxygen.
Forever is not just an abstract concept but also a myth. So, simply embrace whatever you have presently (be it people, things or situation that you are in), treasure it, value it but then do not take it to the ‘forever angle’. In the end, life itself will take you to that seamless forever – that you craved for with or without the people that you desire now.